Referral Spam

30 April 2012

As someone new to blogging I have been delighted to see that I am getting some page views on my blog.  However I was intrigued about one in particular and decided to find out about the site in my case (www4.best-aruchecker.com).  I foolishly clicked on it and I got an error message.  If you are getting this as part of your stats don't click on it.  It will infect your computer with a virus.  If you want further information you can look here or here.  If you have clicked make sure you run your anti-virus programme as soon as possible!

We have been mainly.........

missing daddy this week.  I have already posted about him returning into the fold, but during the week leading up to his return it was really hard for the children.

We started the week with our weekly trip in to the local town for food shopping and a visit to the library.  We arrived home with our new selection of books which is always exciting.

The next three days we had play dates.  The first at a friends house the other two days at ours.  At our friends we managed to stay outside for most of the day.  My oldest spent most of the time building and setting up a base on a shed roof, at one point he was up there with two other friends sitting in deck chairs looking through binoculars and chatting away!  On the days we had friends to play I could tell that not all was well.  My oldest didn't seem to want to play, preferring to be alone on the sofa with a book.  I was concerned that the week was too busy for him and I had not allowed enough time alone. On talking to him discovered that he was missing daddy and did not feel like playing much.  We were due to go out the next day, so I suggested that we wait and see how we felt in the morning as to whether we would or not.

We started the day at home playing with lego.  The time raced by, we all sat together on the floor amongst a sea of pieces and minifigures, creating models, playing with them and the minifigures.  Around lunch time my youngest announced that she wanted to go out somewhere.  My oldest looked at me, I said that the choice was his today and we would do whatever he wanted.  About an hour later he announced he did want to go, but only for a play.  We were joining a home ed group who were doing a workshop.  We packed a picnic and off we went.  We had a lovely afternoon in the sunshine sitting with our friends as they built their creations.  I didn't see my oldest for the whole time we were there.  He announced in the car on the way home that he had a great afternoon.

We had another day of sunshine the following day it has been along time since we had two days of sun!  We had a great day which you can read about here.  We all went to bed excited about the return of daddy/husband in the morning.

Together

29 April 2012

My husband returned home to us today after working away for two weeks, whilst this is not very long for me, for the children it goes on forever.  The last few days have been the hardest for them. 

This morning when we woke up they knew that daddy would be home very soon.  They got dressed and ate their breakfast in record time and then waited at the window at the front of the house for the car to return him.  They (thankfully) did not have long to wait.  I was upstairs sorting washing when I heard the whoops of delight, he's here, he's here, daddy's home.  They ran to the door and nearly knocked him over.  The smiles on their faces and the emotion oozing from their bodies bought tears to my eyes as I watched them from the top of the stairs.

They have spend every minute of the rest of the day at his side.  They showed him all the things that we have been doing over the last two weeks.  We will have a period of a few days of adjustment now as we all get used to being a complete family again, but it is so good to have him safe at home with us again.

Spontaneity

28 April 2012

Every now and again we have a great day when we have nothing planned.  At some point soon after they wake up, my children usually ask, what are we going to do today?  This morning I answered we have nothing planned.  On coming downstairs for breakfast I realised that we had a parcel to pick up from the post office.  The weather was not looking good at that point so did not make a plan in my head of when to pick it up, but we had to by 12pm or it would have to wait till Monday.

As the morning wore on the weather brightened and the sun actually came out.  I raided the fridge and the cupboards, put an impromptu picnic in a bag, got us all dressed and off we went.  Parcel picked up, we headed for the park.  It was still cool in the wind but we had great fun.  Playing on the park equipment, a game of tig and throwing and kicking a ball.  The children did not want to come home we were out for most of the afternoon.  I love days like this, where you have no plans but still have a great relaxing day. 

It is now coming to an end with a most beautiful sunset, I cannot remember when we last had one this year.  I do hope this warmer weather we have had for the last two days lasts a bit longer.

Bumping

26 April 2012

My eldest and I have been moving along to a different beat on several days over the last couple of weeks.  It feels like we are constantly bumping into each other and out of rhythm.  I wish I knew what was the cause of it.  I suspect it is a number of factors such as tiredness, being too busy, and Daddy/Husband being away.

We were due to be going out (again) tomorrow but after talking about it we have decided to have a few days of recharging and resting at home.  It is hard to find a balance in life between having contact with friends and recharging and resting as a family.  We haven't quite found the balance yet, I hope given time we find it.

We have been mainly.........

25 April 2012

changing plans this week and still ended up having a great, busy week.

We started the week with our usual visit into town for shopping and the library.  We found some great books and a storysack to take home.  One of the these, I see the Moon by Jacqueline Mitton, is a storybook which introduces the phases of the moon, the illustrations are simple and colourful, a great read.

We usually follow our shopping day with three days of play dates.  We were looking forward to these as we have been on holiday.  Sadly two of these weren't to be this week so we had to change our plans.

We had one day at home quietly together, I should have been tidying away all the holiday stuff but somehow there was always something else to do!  The following day we visited a second hand bookshop in a nearby town.  A great shop but too easy to spend lots of money, which we did, we found lots of good books.  Now I need to find space for them on the shelves.

We joined a home-ed group for a fire station visit towards the end of the week.  This was due to be followed by a picnic but as it was raining (a common theme this week) we ended up at friends house for a play and our picnic.  This extended to staying for tea much to the delight of the children.

The weekend dawned dry so I decided to chance it and do our monthly walk in a local wood (it was the only day we could fit it in this month we usually go during the week).  When we arrived at the car park the rain was coming down by the bucket load, hmmm.  When it eased we jumped out and put on our coats and it stopped, hurrah.  The walk was fantastic, the rain stayed away, and the sun shone towards the end, still cold though.  We got chased by cows, saw badger poo, identified some wild flowers, hairy violet, slender speedwell and cuckoo flower were just a few, my eldest thought the names were great. Made hot chocolate by the river where we watched a fish jumping, saw a grey wagtail, a dipper feeding it's young and a new one to us, a common sandpiper.  We heard a woodpecker and smelt the wild garlic, all in all a wonderful walk.

The last day of the week, dawned (you've guessed it) wet.  We made and packed a picnic which took all morning, I felt like I was wading through treacle and went off to meet some friends for a train ride.  Dodging the rain drops we ran to the train and sat and ate our picnic on the train whilst it went back and forth.  On the way home we popped into a small train museum which was about to close but looked interesting so will go back for a proper visit one day.  We stopped for a cuppa at our friend's house before heading home for tea and a rest after a busy week.

Urticaria

22 April 2012

I have been living with this condition for a year now, not long I know, but it feels like it's been ages.  I am effected on my hands only, my left hand far worse than my right.

It all started after a week of camping.  When I finished the trip I noticed that I had red itchy blotches on the insides of some of my fingers.  At the time and for months after I thought it was eczema.  I continued to eat my normal diet, vegetarian food cooked from scratch.  I exclude a few foods to manage another health condition.  I carried on using all the same toiletries, but started using more and different hand creams to try to ease the itching.

There were several occasions over the next few months when the symptoms subsided, it is so easy in hindsight to realise why but at the time I did not make the connection.  I did extensive research into eczema and managing it on the internet and in books but I could never quite find any information which matched my actual symptoms.  I had decided from the outset not to consult my GP.

After six months during which time my fingers had got gradually fatter (I had had to stop wearing my engagement ring as it was too tight) with swelling, I noticed after a day out with friends the next morning my hands were considerably more swollen and my fingers could hardly bend.  I consulted my homeopathy book to find a remedy for swelling.  There was one, Apis mel, this remedy is also used for urticaria.  On looking up urticaria in the index, I found other remedies which described exactly my symptoms.  I then started to research urticaria and how to manage it.  I was troubled to read that it is difficult to manage and can be almost impossible to pin point the triggers.  Not one to give in to such information I carried on reading.

About a month into that journey I woke one morning with an eye swollen shut.  My hands by this point were so swollen they were pretty much straight every day, many simple tasks were very difficult, I was unable to drive.  One of triggers for the swelling I discovered was limonene, an essential oil.  It was in virtually every household cleaning and toiletry product in my home.  I stopped using them all and the effect was incredible.  Within a few days my hands were far less swollen but I still had the intense itchiness on most mornings (this is the only time of day that I am ever itchy).  Trying to find products without limonene in was another journey in itself, I will post about that another time

I carried on researching and chanced upon a website that talked about histamine intolerance.  It outlined foods that are high and low in histamine and foods that make you body produce more histamine.  I was astounded to read the list of foods that make your body produce more histamine, as so many of them were foods that I already excluded from my diet to manage another condition.  I went through the list and started to exclude all the other foods on the list that I eat regularly.

I also discovered that certain food colours and some preservatives mainly sulphites, MSG, BHT and BHA.  The food I had eaten during the week that had triggered this would have been high in all or most of these.  This diet was a huge change from my normal one.

A year on, I know what all my triggers are.  I have been symptom free for two months now.  My skin on my hands is back to normal.  I lost four fingernails during the height of a particularly bad flare up, which damaged the nail bed.  Two of those are back to normal the other two are getting there.   If and when I do have a flare up, I use two homeopathic remedies apis mel and urtica urens.

Avoiding the preservatives is challenging, I have to read the labels on everything I buy, even something I buy every week.  Ingredients have changed which I have discovered to my cost.  Also if an ingredient within the product contains one the those preservatives it might not be mentioned so I have to be aware of what they might be in too!  I hardly used to eat out much, but I now I never do.  All food I eat needs to be cooked by myself or by someone of whom I can ask them what they put in it, tedious but necessary.

It is hardly surprising really that the triggers have turned out to be unnatural additives in foods.

Nostalgia

18 April 2012

I was walking past a house in my village the other day, when I noticed a model on the windowsill that caught my eye.  It was a horse pulling a cart laden with loose hay with a man sat on top.  It harked back to an era of farming that is non-existent in this country now.  One that was labour intensive.  I am not for one moment suggesting that we should go back to that, although it might reduce the level of unemployment, but it got me thinking about how we talk about the golden times of the past.  What are missing that was so good.

In a time when farming and many other industries were labour intensive people who worked together often lived in the same community, be that in villages, towns or cities, that they worked in.  They all knew each other.  Not only did they live and work together they also socialised together.  At church, in the pub, at the local shop.  Some even went on holiday together.

Nowadays, with the rise of car ownership, we might live in a place and work somewhere miles away.  Our colleagues might come as far from the opposite direction so that you actually live hundreds of miles apart.  We might go for the odd drink with colleagues after work, but time spent with them outside of work is minimal.  If we work a long way from where we live, we may only spend any time in that location at weekends.   Even then we may be out doing the shopping or not actually in the location where we live at all.  How many people know their neighbours, or any of the folks that live near them.  If you do not feel part of any community where you live or work is it any wonder then, that online communities are thriving?

Perfection

17 April 2012

We strive in our lives to make things perfect.  You only have to open certain magazines or newspapers and read the articles or look at the adverts that show us how others think we should be living our lives.  Do we really want our homes and ourselves to look that?  Is that really what we want or is it what we think we want?

We want our houses to be tidy and clean most, if not all, of the time.  Is this practical and achievable if you have children.  Why is this important to so many of us, where does this pressure come from.  If we are sitting with our children reading to them or playing a game with them, but all the time thinking I really should be doing x or y, we are so distracted that we are not present with our children.  Not only are we not doing x or y we are are also not giving our time to our children either.

It is important to consider what our priorities need to be.  Do we want our house to always be clean and tidy, do we want to spend the maximum time possible being present with our children, do we want to always cook every meal from scratch. do we want only shop for food once a week etc.  It is much easier to achieve our goals if we decide what they should be and them aim for them, however it is also vital to be realistic.  There is no point having a list of goals that is not achievable, simply because there are too many on the list.

As a mother we have many pulls on our time.   I remember a time when I would spend the day doing things with my children but I wasn't present with them and they knew it.  I was thinking about all the things I could or should be doing.  And is not just about all the jobs in the house that need doing, it is also about us, as people, being able to do stuff for ourselves.  Often as a Mother your me time is drastically reduced or non-existent unless you want to stay up late or get up mega early and as result be sleep deprived too.  Or I suppose you could just spend the day ignoring your children.

After the birth of my youngest child I bemoaned the loss of my me time (I had just started to get it back after the first).  I resented the fact that it had gone, and that everyone in the house (including my husband) could do what they wanted when they wanted except me.  I soon realised that such resentment was destructive it was affecting my relationship with my children and my husband.  It was time for me re-evaluate what was important, what were my priorities.  My me time would have to be put on hold for a short while, it would not be that long in the bigger scheme of things .  I also decided that I needed to be present for my children as much as possible.  It was important to me that I could spend time cooking meals from scratch and allow time to plan a week of meals, put together a shopping list of the ingredients and shop once a week for everything we will need for those meals (and anything else we needed from the local town).  I no longer have the daily dilemma at some point in the day of what are we going to have for tea tonight.

My house is less tidy, it gets cleaned less often (apart from the kitchen counters) the hoover is only out sporadically, but I think my house is a calmer place for it.  I have more balance in my life.

Expedition

16 April 2012

The last two weeks have been a hectic whirl, but they were well worth it.  The first week was spend in preparation for our holiday.  Not only did we have packing to do with the attendant mess that that makes but I also needed to cook meals for the following week too.  In the space of three days I cooked the food for each of those days plus the following seven!  By the end of it I was fed up with the endless time I seemed to be spending in the kitchen and the mound of washing up it created,  I knew it would be worth it for the following week.

The second week we travelled up to Scotland with our trusty open canoe on the roof of the car.  We were off on a canoe expedition.  The weather forecast was pretty lousy for the week ahead so our plans were by necessity fluid.  We started off with a night in a campsite at Resipole on the shores of Loch Sunart.

The next day dawned grey with light rain and we decided to start our planned journey of Loch Shiel from the bottom.  We found a pier in the village of Acharacle and got the boats on, the weather forecast was due to change in a few days from south westerly winds (hence launching a the bottom of the Loch) to Northerlies so we were not sure if we would make it to Glenfinnan at the other end.  We therefore left both cars (we were with another family) at Acharacle, a decision that was not entirely wise as we discovered as the week went on.  Our first day of paddling took us along the flat countryside that surrounds the Loch at this point.  The wind was strong but behind us (yippee) and the rain showery but not persistant.  We met some other paddlers shortly before stopping for lunch going against the wind, they told us they had direction envy!  We found a beach for lunch and then went to explore the island of Eilean Fhianain which has the remains of a chapel and an extensive burial ground.  We continued on our journey and decided to camp for the night at Rubha na h-Airde.  Whilst the adults put the tent and shelter up and got a brew going the children went off exploring.  They found evidence of otters in many places but sadly we did not see any.  The evening was dry with a magnificent sunset which we enjoyed with a stroll on the beach to a shingle bar.  You could really see the evidence of the action of the water on the bar as the shingle had been pushed up and graded by the water, the bar is slowly growing out into the loch, who knows if one day if will change the shape of the loch?  We built a great fire and rigged a tripod of wood poles to boil water for tea in the billy.

Day two dawned gray and drizzly, the rain stopped to allow us to take the tents down although they were all soaking wet.  It rained hard as we got onto the water.  The wind was still behind us (at least we had something to be thankful for) it rained on and off all morning, we stopped for lunch in a sheltered bay and put up the shelter.  Almost immediately the sky cleared and the sun came out and we had a wonderful lunch in the sunshine which dried us all out nicely.  The sun shone for the rest of the afternoon and we had a lovely paddle to somewhere near Coille Ruighe nam Fiadh where we decided to camp for the night.  It was a mostly dry evening although the rain really came down just at the time we decided to build a fire for the evening, I went to bed at this point but I think they did get a fairly decent fire going in the end and made and cooked some bread on it.

Day three dawned dry, however it had rained in the night and my tent was in a huge puddle, the bottom of my sleeping bag was sodden as were mine and my youngest's sleep mats.  Hey ho!  It was very cold and the snow line had definitely lowered in the night it was only a couple of hundred metres above us now.  We packed up and got back on the water, the only morning that it was not raining as we did so.  The wind was still blowing south westerly so we decided to continue to Glenfinnan and then hitch back to the cars at Acharacle.  This last day was completely dry, the views of the hills were magnificent in all directions, we could see the tops (we had not seen most of them before then).  We stopped for lunch and arrived in a very sunny Glenfinnan at around 1pm.  The men then went off to retrieve the cars whilst the rest of us waited at the pier.  We got all the wet kit out to dry and had hours of fun watching boats come in and out, throwing stones in the loch, building sculptures and shapes with rocks, drinking tea and eating.  The children during their long wait never once said I'm bored or how much longer?  The cars arrived back at about 5pm, the men had hitched but also had to walk about 10 miles to get them so both has very sore feet (wet socks in wellies not a great combination).  We ate our tea at the pier before setting off for the hamlet of Camasinas on the shores of Loch Sunart.

The next three nights were spent on the shores of Loch Sunart it was dry and sunny with glorious sunsets and sun rises.  We had an explore of the loch to the east of us to wet our appetite for returning here for a longer trip.  As Loch Sunart is a sea loch the wildlife was very different.  Where the water was shallow enough you could see masses of seaweed, crabs, mussels, limpets, barnacles and a few starfish.  We will definitely be returning to this area for a longer trip.

Our last day was spent exploring the Ardnamurchan peninsula by car.  We visited the wonderful Nadurra Visitor Centre a small natural history centre in Glenmore which was housed in an amazing building.  It was a very interesting display about the area and well worth a visit.  We then drove on to the Point of Ardnamurchan, the most westerly point in the British Isles.  We climbed the lighthouse at the point and enjoyed views of many islands including Treshnish, Dutchmans Cap, Coll, Barra, South Uist, Rhum, Muck and Eigg to name but a few.  There is also a small exhibition in a building at the base of the tower.  We decided to cook our tea here, but just as we were about to eat, and in keeping with the rest of the week, the rain came down for a short sharp shower!

We returned home the next day tired but happy, now we just have the cleaning of kit and the putting away to do..........

Quiet

15 April 2012

I have spent the last week completely outside.  My only aural stimulation has been other people with me and the wonderful sounds of nature.  It wasn't until travelling home in the car that I realised how calming this is.  During the five hour journey the radio, CD or ipod were playing continuously.  At one point my youngest started to protest that the music was too loud, even when turned down really quietly.  I reflected on what she was actually trying to say and realised that the music was too much and I too wanted it to be turned off.  My ears were hurting with the stimulation and needed a rest.

 In our house the radio used to be on all day, it would be turned on when we came down for breakfast and turned off only to watch a DVD, listen to music, going out the house or going to bed.  Most of the time it was only really background noise that I would tune in or out too most of the time.  I have now been experimenting since being back at home.   I am only turning the radio on when there is a programme that I actually want to listen to, when it has finished I turn it off.  If I am doing something that requires my total concentration such as reading to myself or the children I am no longer distracted by sound bites coming from the radio.  My ears feel rested.  I hope the calmness continues....

We have been mainly........

02 April 2012

out and about this week.  After a quiet week at home last week, we have gone to the other extreme this week, out every day of the week!

We started the week with our usual trip into town, this time without a break in shopping to visit the library.  It felt strange not to arrive home and spend time looking at new books.  The library was closed for refurbishment we will wait to see next week what has changed.

We had three play dates arranged for the week.  The first our long standing arrangement on Tuesday, the weather was really warm and much fun was had outside on the trampoline and wading in a local river.  On Wednesday we met a family for a picnic in the sunshine followed by a short walk along an old railway line nearby.  The flowers are now starting to emerge making the edges of the line a colourful tableau.

On Thursday we had a long day out.  We had to get up early which was not as hard as I was expecting.  Sometimes trying to get out of the house at a particular time is like swimming against the tide.  We had a train to catch, so could not be late.  After the train we caught a bus and arrived at our destination, a science museum.  For the next four hours we immersed ourselves in the world of science and industry.  Looking at and interacting with exhibits on gas, electricity, water, sewerage, recycling, aeroplanes, cars, working engines and locomotives.   We then did the same journey in reverse, a bus journey to the train station, a long walk across the station to our platform.  We were a bit early so sat in the waiting room and had a bite to eat, we had our backs to the platform I was rather shocked when we left the room to get on our train to find that the platform was chock full of people!  Luckily for us the train was going to two places and we needed to be on the fairly empty back part.  We arrived home very tired but all agreed it was a good day out.

On Friday we visited new friends at their house in a nearby city.  The children had fun playing inside and out, although the weather is starting to cool now and coats had to put on!

Over the weekend we went to a birthday party and