Seesaw

Sometimes you have a day when it feels like life is trying to throw everything at you.  A day when no matter what you do it is hard to keep smiling.  How many times can you pick yourself up after getting knocked down.

We had a day out yesterday, a full day out, I needed to collect alot of stuff together in a short amount of time, clothes, food, drink.  Getting out of the house by a certain time is my least favourite activity, especially when it is early, read before ten am!  I did manage to leave on time but I forgot wellies, it was raining and we were going to be outside a lot, it was too late to go back so on we went minus wellies.  We managed ok we got damp feet but we were warm, I had remembered waterproofs, hats, gloves and scarves.

We finished the day at a friends house for a welcome fire and warming cup of tea.  I managed to reverse our, new to us, car into a tree outside their house.  Bang, the light fitting smashed, we have owned it for a day.  When it was time to leave my eldest and his friend vanished, competely.  It took us half an hour to find them by which time we were starting to feel disconcerted as neither is a child likely to disappear or run off.  They evidently did not want their time together to end as it was another  half an hour before we were all in the car on the way home.  It was now getting late and I was hungry.

I stopped on the way to buy an ingredient for tea.  I jumped out the car and ran into the shop as I wanted to be quick.  Yes I did leave the children in the car.  However my youngest wanted to come in and as I reappeared with my purchase in my hand she started to scream at me and would not go anywhere near the car.  I was now entering a semi dream like state, one where I felt that I was not really experiencing what was going on and I was going to wake up in a minute and be at home with tea cooked and on the table.  I did not feel capable of shouting or raising my voice but somehow I calmly managed to get us all in the car and on the way home.

I found when I arrived home that the folks who were coming to buy our old car had not turned up and were not answering any calls, my husband was fed up of the hanging around.  I found that the cauliflower that we were going to eat for tea was much smaller than I thought, it was late, I was hungry and tea was not yet started.  The tea I cooked was edible but certainly not my best, my youngest would not touch it.

By now I was exhausted, not the physical sort of tired which is actually quite pleasant, doing anything involving my brain was impossible.  I felt like I was wading through cotton wool.  I headed for my bed the safest place to be in the hope that rest would restore my seesaw back to level.