Hello.
Life has moved on. By, ahem, 18 months.
A long pause.
filled with things known, parenting, knitting sewing, work, volunteering, fundraising, a trip to South Korea (Alice).
and unknown, more work hours, more fundraising, a trip to Norway (Cameron), learning Romanian.
College is finished, courses successfully completed. Home educating continues into a sixteenth year. I am savouring these years knowing that they are slowing moving to their end.
As we move into a new season our lives shift into one too. Cameron is out at work, full time, earning funds for future travel plans. Alice is considering her future and where she might want that to go, pondering exams her cohort will take next year, will she too? Pockets of time are ever expanding for me to do as I choose, it continues to be a novel experience, one which I am learning to lean into. I will always be a parent but I can feel things shifting, I am not always needed.
This new season is also a time for resetting things, a particular kind of new year. After a summer of a free form version of routine it is time to find a new one, one that fits where we are now, this might be different to one that has gone before. And that is ok.
Like the tides we are pulled together regularly by the need to eat and to enjoy each others company. A sacred time every evening. A tradition started my mum who insisted me and my siblings were home for tea every day whatever we were doing, in those days before mobile phones the time imprinted on to us via a blackboard in our kitchen. We linger a little longer at this time of day now, making sure we eat at a time when no one needs to rush off. These times are important aren't they, it won't be long before we are just two at home, the children out in the world doing their own thing. I need time to move slowly right now, to prolong these moments and treasure them whilst I still have them.
Pauses are a permanent feature for me now, I am leaning into them and finally able to enjoy them completely guilt free. Book reading in the middle of the day, yep. Napping when I am tired, yep. Ignoring the housework when I need to rest, yep. Life is still crazy busy and filled to the brim but sometimes there is room in there for a wee pause, one that is not filled with the guilt that us mums are warrant to pile on ourselves.
What do you fill your pauses with?
Good morning my lovely, what a delight to find new words from you, welcome back to blogland. Always such a pleasure to read a new post.
ReplyDeletePauses have been opening up here too, a definite thumbs up for book reading after lunch, ignoring housework (and acknowledging that rest is needed) and sewing.
Thank you for your lovely comment, glad to hear that you enjoy pausing too :)
DeleteHello again and welcome back. Pauses are so important, aren't they? Time to think, plan, consider, relax. Reading is a big one for me.
ReplyDeleteBest wishes and keep enjoying those pauses.
Ellie
Thank you Ellie. Glad to hear that you have time for pauses too.
DeleteLovely to see you blogging again. There have been many pauses here since my chicks fled the nest but I continue to fill my days with lovely things, as well as the more boring houseworky things.
ReplyDeleteThank you Jo, glad to hear that you have days filled with pauses and lovely things, that sounds wonderful!
DeleteIt was lovely to see you pop up on my blog feed today. I hope you find your new routine. Xx
ReplyDeleteThank you Jules, that is so kind of you. The routine is slowly taking shape, not quite there yet.
DeleteWhen I used to be on the old Twitter site I followed an account called The Ministry of Rest. I took their posts very seriously because I am the type that feels guilty if I am not doing something productive and it was wearing me down. Rest is doing something, so is pausing. Learning to be still has been hard but I'm getting better at it.
ReplyDeleteThe Ministry of Rest sounds interesting. It is so hard to undo the guilt isn't it, I so hear you on that one. That pressure to be productive is exhausting and ultimately counter productive. Rest is absolutely doing something, it took me a long time to work that one out.
DeleteI love a good pause - it's time to rethink and reprioritize life's values.
ReplyDeleteHi Karen, pauses for rethinking and reprioritising sound perfect to me. I have never been one for jumping into things.
DeleteI am so happy to see you writing again! I have missed your thoughtful and thought- filled posts. Thank you for commenting on my blog today. Larry is very much better, thank goodness. Can't keep a good man down!
ReplyDeleteAww thank you, that is so kind of you, I really appreciate your kind words.
DeleteNice to see you back in blogland, and good to hear you are having a little more time to yourself. xx
ReplyDeleteHi, thank you for your lovely comment!
DeleteGlad to see you return and unpause. Pauses are definitely wonderful when your life is so busy. Long walks and crafting are two of my favourite ways to enjoy the pauses. B x
ReplyDeleteThank you B, long walks and pausing sound like great ways to pause, I love them both too!
DeleteSo, so lovely to see your words reappear. I've missed this space and have checked back periodically (although clearly not in September!). Thank you for your blog comment, which alerted me to head on over... Like you I am discovering more and more pockets of time to do as I choose now that our—at least official!—home education journey is over. Like you, I try to read the books, take the naps, indulge in studies for my own joy, without guilt. For me, all this feels like an ongoing pause that I am both enjoying and learning to lean into. 🧡🙏🏻🍂
ReplyDeleteThank you Alice, it is so kind of you to say that you missed this space, I really appreciate that. It is so lovely to hear that you are feeling into your pockets of time in a way that is kind to yourself and without guilt. It is so important that we are able to do that isn't it.
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